The Jewish Get: Understanding Religious Divorce and Its Intersection With California Family Law

Quick Answer: A Get is a religious divorce document required under Jewish law (Halacha) to formally dissolve a Jewish marriage. A civil divorce in California does not constitute a Get, and without one, a religiously observant Jewish spouse cannot remarry within Jewish law. The Get process is overseen by a rabbi or rabbinical court, requires the husband to initiate and the wife to willingly accept the document, and must be completed voluntarily by both parties to be valid.

If you have questions about how the Get intersects with your California divorce, contact The Geller Firm at (415) 840-0570 for a confidential consultation.

What Is a Get in Jewish Law?

A Get is a formal document of divorce under Jewish law. Its name comes from the Hebrew word for the document itself, which has been used in Jewish communities for thousands of years to dissolve marriages in accordance with Halacha, the body of Jewish religious law.

The Get is not simply a ceremonial formality. For religiously observant Jews, it is a legal necessity. A marriage that has been dissolved by a civil court but not by a Get remains a valid Jewish marriage under Halacha. Without a Get, a Jewish woman who remarries may be considered to have entered into an adulterous relationship under Jewish law, and children born of that subsequent relationship may carry the status of mamzer, a classification under Jewish law that carries significant social and religious consequences within observant communities.

The Get therefore carries profound religious, social, and personal implications that extend well beyond the civil divorce proceeding.

How Does the Get Process Work?

The Get process is conducted under the supervision of a rabbinical authority, either an individual rabbi or a rabbinical court known as a Beit Din. The process involves several carefully prescribed steps under Jewish law:

The husband initiates the Get. Under traditional Jewish law, the Get must be initiated by the husband. He must commission a trained religious scribe, called a sofer, to write the Get document according to precise religious specifications. The document is written specifically for the parties involved and cannot be a generic or pre-printed form.

The document is written by a sofer. The sofer writes the Get by hand in Aramaic, incorporating the full Hebrew names of both parties and the location where the Get is being written. The process is meticulous and may take several hours.

The husband presents the Get to his wife. In the presence of two qualified witnesses and under rabbinical supervision, the husband presents the Get document to his wife. The presentation must be voluntary. A Get given under duress is not valid under Jewish law.

The wife accepts the Get. The wife must willingly receive the Get. She cannot be coerced into accepting it. Her acceptance, witnessed and supervised by the rabbinical authority, completes the religious divorce.

The Get is finalized. Once accepted, the rabbinical authority typically cuts the document to prevent its reuse and issues each party a certificate confirming that the Get was properly executed. This certificate, sometimes called a petur or release document, serves as proof of the religious divorce.

Why Is the Get Necessary if a Civil Divorce Is Obtained?

A California civil divorce dissolves the legal marriage recognized by the state. It addresses property division, spousal support, child custody, and all civil legal obligations arising from the marriage. What it does not do is dissolve the religious marriage recognized by Jewish law.

For non-observant Jews, this distinction may carry little practical significance. For religiously observant Jews, however, the civil divorce and the Get are entirely separate proceedings that must both be completed for the individual to be fully free in the eyes of their religious community.

A Jewish woman who has obtained a civil divorce but not a Get is referred to as an agunah, meaning a chained woman. She is civilly free but religiously bound, unable to remarry within Jewish law for as long as her husband withholds the Get. The situation of the agunah is one of the most discussed and debated issues in contemporary Jewish law precisely because it places the power to grant religious freedom entirely in the hands of one party.

What Happens if a Spouse Refuses to Grant a Get?

The refusal to grant a Get is a recognized problem in Jewish communities worldwide. A husband who withholds the Get may do so as leverage in civil divorce negotiations, out of spite, or for other reasons. A wife who refuses to accept the Get, while less common, creates a symmetric problem.

The spouse who uses Get refusal as leverage, sometimes called a mesurav get, may face significant social and religious pressure within their community, including public announcements of the refusal by the Beit Din, community shunning, and other religious sanctions.

From a California civil law perspective, courts are constrained by the First Amendment from directly ordering a spouse to grant or accept a Get, as doing so would constitute judicial intervention in a religious matter. However, California courts have developed limited tools to address the issue indirectly:

Incorporation by reference. If the parties have entered into a premarital or separation agreement that includes a commitment to participate in the Get process, a California court may enforce that civil contract obligation, not as a religious matter but as a breach of a secular agreement.

Consideration in equitable proceedings. Some California courts have taken Get refusal into account when exercising discretion over spousal support, property division, and attorney's fees, treating willful obstruction of the Get process as a factor in the overall equities of the case, though this approach is not uniformly applied and is subject to constitutional limitations.

Rabbinical court proceedings. The primary recourse for compelling a Get remains within the rabbinical court system. A Beit Din that finds one party is wrongfully withholding the Get may issue a seruv, a formal rabbinical contempt order, and publicize the refusal within the Jewish community.

How Does the Get Interact With a California Civil Divorce?

The Get and the California civil divorce are parallel processes that must both be completed independently. Neither automatically accomplishes the other. In practice, the timing and sequencing of the two proceedings is an important consideration for observant Jewish couples.

Some couples choose to complete the Get either before or simultaneously with the civil divorce to ensure both are resolved together. Others complete the civil divorce first and address the Get separately through rabbinical channels.

If the civil divorce is finalized before the Get is obtained and the non-cooperative spouse then refuses to engage in the Get process, the aggrieved spouse may have limited civil law remedies and may need to pursue the matter through rabbinical channels exclusively.

For this reason, Jewish couples going through a California divorce who are concerned about the Get are well advised to raise the issue with both their rabbi and their family law attorney at the earliest stage of the proceedings, so that appropriate provisions can be incorporated into any settlement agreement or addressed proactively before the civil divorce is finalized.

What Is the Emotional Significance of the Get?

Beyond its legal and religious function, the Get carries deep emotional significance. Divorce is never an easy experience, and the Get process, when conducted properly and voluntarily, offers a formal framework for acknowledging the end of the marriage within the context of the couple's faith and community.

For many observant Jews, obtaining the Get provides a sense of closure and religious legitimacy to the dissolution of the marriage that the civil divorce alone does not fully supply. It marks the formal end of the religious covenant entered into at the wedding and opens the door to new beginnings within the framework of Jewish life and law.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is a Get required for a civil divorce in California? No. California civil law does not require a Get. The Get is a religious requirement under Jewish law and is entirely separate from the civil divorce proceeding.

Can a California court order a spouse to grant a Get? Generally no. The First Amendment prohibits courts from directly ordering religious acts. However, if the parties entered into a civil agreement to participate in the Get process, a court may enforce that agreement as a secular contract.

What is a prenuptial agreement regarding the Get? Some Jewish couples include a Halachic prenuptial agreement, such as those promoted by the Beth Din of America, that creates a civil contractual obligation to appear before a Beit Din and cooperate in the Get process in the event of a civil divorce. These agreements are designed to be enforceable in secular courts as civil contracts and are one of the most effective tools available to prevent Get refusal.

What happens to children if a Get is not obtained? The children of a civilly divorced couple whose religious marriage was not dissolved by a Get are not themselves affected in terms of their Jewish status. The issue primarily affects the status of any future children born to either parent in a subsequent relationship not preceded by a valid Get.

Can a woman initiate a Get under Jewish law? Under traditional Jewish law, the husband must initiate and grant the Get. A wife cannot unilaterally issue a Get. She may, however, petition a Beit Din to pressure or compel her husband to do so, and various rabbinic authorities have developed mechanisms within Halacha to address situations where the husband is withholding the Get without valid justification.

Speak With a California Family Law Attorney

Navigating a Jewish divorce involves both civil and religious dimensions that must be handled with care and coordination. Whether you need guidance on how to address the Get in your California divorce proceedings, how to incorporate Get-related provisions into a settlement agreement, or how to handle a spouse who is withholding the Get, The Geller Firm can help. We represent clients across California in all aspects of family law, including matters involving religious and cultural considerations.

We offer confidential virtual and in-person consultations from our Walnut Creek office.

Call (415) 840-0570 or contact us online to schedule your consultation.